


Rally Day

by JenCforCarolina



Series: Auburn [12]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: AUBURN
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 20:28:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17148578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenCforCarolina/pseuds/JenCforCarolina
Summary: No one talks to Zavala during the Faction Rally, their attentions elsewhere. No one that is, save Auburn, looking for tales.Secret Santa gift for Juri!





	Rally Day

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CoffeeCats](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoffeeCats/gifts).



Auburn settles herself against the railing at Zavala’s side. He turns his head to acknowledge her. 

“Titan?”

“Got nothing, just wanted to chat.”

He casts his gaze over the tower walk. Banners announcing Dead Orbit, New Monarchy, and Future War Cult hang between the lamp-posts. Auburn always shys away from faction week. He finds it commendable, despite his current displeasure with her recent company.

“It’s a rally day, no one’s going to bother you with reports.” She prods, and is right.

“That does not mean I am willing to…chat.” He warns.

“Still mad at me?” Auburn pretends not to be hurt and shrinks back into her own space. Picks at a fleck of charged chitin glassed to her pauldron. She got it on Mars, the particular sheen of the carapace betrays the frozen hive brood. She’d been back to speak to Ana again, or worse, the Warmind himself. 

“I am not mad-” He retorts.

“Disappointed.” Auburn interrupts, and he bites his tongue to avoid giving her any signal that her assumption may be correct. It’s a youthful and contrary display of spite. She notices, and chuckles wryly.

“Maybe I’ll understand better, if you explain.” She tries. “I know I’m still green but I have a sense about people, I can feel the history.”

“You are twelve, that’s hardly green.” He doesn’t have the time or energy to remember much about all his guardians, but he puts a bit of effort in for the Titans. Auburn has as long a list of mental notes as some four times her age. Maybe that’s why twelve doesn’t feel so young on her.

“It’s a fragment of a lifetime compared to most.” Auburn protests, humbly.

He hums, turning his next words over in his head. “Still, not green, perhaps blue?” It’s a reaching joke about her fireteam, Fireteam Blue, named for her teammates, a blue exo and blue awoken. 

Auburn gets the punchline after a few seconds, and grins wide. “Zavala! A joke? Don’t make me fetch Cayde!”

He draws out a sigh.

“Kidding, I would never.” She settles back against the railing to watch the satellites of the Traveler spin lazily through the sky. Lately, it’s been easy to imagine the great creature stretching blearily in dawnlight every morning.

“But… really I do want to understand.” She presses. “Please. Why are you afraid of Rasputin?”

Zavala took in a stiff and silent breath, let it out, and looked inward. It was not fear that informed his decisions. It was guilt. He knew that. How to explain?

_What did he remember? Grief, so strong and potent. The horrible urge to break something. Catastrophic loss, and then the desire to do something. He was not alone in that._

“Mare Imbrium shook us all. Everyone had their own ways of searching for solace afterwards. The search for new weapons and resources was not unpopular.”

“He was an exo titan, bold and brave. Wanted to understand more of himself, and the others. He thought if we could find and repair other exos, if we could better our understanding -maybe even someday make more- we would gain an edge. I… agreed at the time. He enlisted a pair of warlocks to help, they were eager. These three, began digging about Bray.”

Did he regret that he had allowed this? Yes, but only for the consequences that came much later. At the time, it had been logical, and wise, to search for another edge in the fight. At the time, he’d had no idea it would lead to the waking of Rasputin. It was a mistake...

“Was this the reasoning behind the rule against digging into a guardian’s past?” Auburn asks delicately.

“No, that was long before myself, even. I don’t know the cause of that rule- I merely follow it.” It’s a barb at Ana, Auburn is attentive enough to catch it, but she does not react.

He continues. “I allowed this team to delve on the technicality that they were researching all exos, not their individual selves. The fireteam agreed easily, I believed their mission was true, and I had no reason to mistrust.”

“It was too massive an undertaking for the Vanguard to commit more resources to, too far fetched a plan, so I allowed them to search on their own, and asked them to report on whatever they found. It took them years to find the data, wrench it from enemy hold, and decrypt it. But eventually they uncovered comprehensive information on the exos… and of Rasputin.”

_What did he remember? Clenched-throat guilt. Pounding heartbeat and spinning head. Debriefings caught on the tip of his tongue, the things he’d been preparing to tell them when they returned._

“They gathered three more Guardians and ran a dual strike on one of the Bray facilities on Mars. They attempted to contact Rasputin, and he obliterated all of them. I was running tactical with live telemetry.”

Auburn’s face is tight and conflicted, but she keeps herself mute.

“They were the first. And not the last. We sent a recovery team, four hunters. They were lost as well. After ten guardians, we named the area a quarantine zone, and locked it down.”

He shrugs his shoulders in discomfort, tightened his grip on the railing. “I should have left it buried there, should have barred all contact with Rasputin. But the occasional warsat always held valuable surveillance data, or at least something for the cryptarchs.”

Again, mistakes. Too desperate for something to save them, too keen on searching for a weapon. He wanted, then, to be both a shield and a sword. He has learned, since, that if you wish to be effective as either, you must choose one to focus your effort into.

He looks to Auburn finally, and she swallows as though he is accusing her. “There would always be some who found information, and grew curious. Guardians came to us with plans of attack, with scouting information. They were all confident in their own preparations, and we forbade every last one. Some tried anyway. Few who did survived.”

_What did he remember? Largest fleet of Ketches he’d ever seen. Skiffs in formation, low over the mountains. Snow crunching underfoot, constant rumble of supers and howls of Fallen. In the wake of victory, the sobriety of counting the lost, among them young Ana._

“It wasn’t until after the Twilight Gap we turned to the option again, officially. It was Andal who brought it up. An intact bunker. Records showed clear data of weapon stockpiles, matched scans from his scouts. I… was against it, but I relented. This time, we sent three strike teams. We armed them with all the information we had from past failures, the maps, the telemetries. They were to retreat at the slightest signs of danger-”

“...And Rasputin bombed them from orbit.” Auburn finishes, resigned. It was a cautionary tale used often since that day. She had heard it many times before.

He waits for her to say more, but she keeps her eyes cast down.

“I was supposed to protect them.” He intones, to fill the silence. “We thought… Rasputin could be our key. We looked to him for help, and were cut down. And now, after what Ana has found, to know that all those times were just fragments… That they couldn’t even help us, and lives were spent on nothing. Rasputin’s halls are too dangerous to be explored.”

“I understand.” Auburn says levelly, but he can hear it in her tone. She hasn’t been convinced. She will still chase the Warmind.

“But still, you insist.” He marvels.

“I do.” She apologizes. “I know it’s silly to think after centuries I can be a magic bullet, but I truly think I understand how to work with him.”

“There is no working with the Warmind.” The comment raises one of her eyebrows incredulously, and yes he thinks of the Warsat it dropped on Ana’s command.

“You see him as a vault, as a wall, something to crack.” Auburn pleads.

“I see him as a monster, who destroys anything that comes near with reckless abandon.” Zavala says tersely.

“Then why hasn’t he killed me?” She punctuates her question with a hand to her chest. “I’ve been in his bunkers a dozen times.”

“Because he’s allowed-”

“Yes.” She breathes, straightening eagerly. “He’s allowed _me_.”

Zavala finds he has no retort for her.

“It’s- I believe it’s respect. Ana thinks he likes her because her name is Bray. But I’m not a Bray. At least I don’t think I am, and she doesn’t either. She doesn’t understand why he listens to me as well. I just think it’s because I’m respectful of him.”

He must radiate chagrin, because she loses some of her animation and excitement, comes back down to earth.

“I know you forbid these things because you don’t want to lose me too.” She adds. “And I’m flattered. But we all take risks. We’re Guardians. I am willing to die on this hill, I’m sure those before me were too. We wouldn’t be trying if we weren’t willing.”

The moment Osiris left, Zavala was named Vanguard Commander. No fanfare, no ceremony. Simply the shift of another weight to his shoulders. And he bears it gladly, the duty to protect his Guardians from themselves, as best he can.

To foresee when battles will be won, and when they have been lost.

He lets out an exasperated breath, nearly a growl, and she folds her arms across her chest stubbornly.

Behind her, a Warlock in New Monarchy colors lets out a screech of expletives as a Dead Orbit Titan shoves her off the tower.

Both Zavala and Auburn turn their heads at the spectacle and sigh.

“I’m not your worst, at least?” Auburn ventures. 

“Hardly.” He agrees, and the slight chuckle between them is enough to mend the moment.

It's a painful minute of decision. Zavala releases a breath, and with it, the past. 

“I will… trust you. And support your endeavors in contacting the warmind. I am confident you would knowingly endanger no one but yourself. Keep me updated on any progress.”

Auburn’s face alights with gratitude, as though his approval is all she ever needs. “Thank you sir.” She breathes.

“Just keep safe, Titan. You have much left to learn.”

Auburn salutes, still radiating contentment, and leaves him to his railing.


End file.
